I have no idea what I am doing.

Jump To

• How I Started

• I asked myself “Why not?”

• What’s to Come

• Thank you!

• Check Out My Poll, Website and Socials!

The other day I was thinking about my whirlwind of a process starting Designs by KLM. At the time of writing this, I have only been designing patterns for about 2 weeks. I have no background in ecommerce, website building, or any experience with newsletters. Let’s be honest, the only newsletters I get and read are from my favorite authors, which doesn’t help me with the content of my own. All I really had was intermediate knowledge of graphic design and using design programs and an iPad. I very much feel like Michael Scott in that episode of The Office when he says “I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.” (Side bar: in all the GIFs in GIPHY, they did not have that specific quote. But I found another one that also fits this situation.)

How I Started

I always wanted to digitally draw because I love drawing but hate the physical process of erasing, colors not being what I want them to be, and other nit picky, nonsensical things. In my mind, to digitally draw, you had to pay for programs, which is not true.

My best friend is writing a book, and I thought “It would be really cool if I could help save her money and draw her a map.” So I found a free drawing program and sketched on my iPad using a rubber tablet stylus. In that small experience, I became obsessed. I ordered a cheap tablet pen and started drawing more. I worked on drawing maps. I made content for our Bookstagram page. I doodled to my hearts content. This is what led me to start drawing patterns.

I found a better free program and sat down one Saturday to draw a gnome, a hedgehog, a sunflower, a mushroom, and some small patches of grass. Those small characters that I thought were cute became my first pattern. This pattern made me think “wouldn’t it be cool to put this on something for people to buy?”

After my first pattern, I wanted to draw a second one focused around cozy book vibes. So I did. When I sat down at my desk the following Monday to work my full-time job, I played YouTube videos all day long of how to better use the drawing program I was using. I looked up videos of how to put patterns on products, how to use sites like RedBubble, what print on demand was, the best platforms to use for free with low usage fees, etc. I was completely enthralled with the idea of me opening my own online shop.

I asked myself “Why not?”

I have never been one to be brimming with self-confidence. On the contrary, I have always struggled with anxiety. Throughout the years, especially the more recent years, I have become better at realizing my self-worth and gaining self-confidence. A big part of gaining confidence (besides my husband who has ALWAYS championed me and realized my potential, even when I didn’t) was starting a Bookstagram account one year ago with two of my best friends. On June 3rd, 2024, we asked ourselves “why not?” “Why not start a Bookstagram?””Why not create content about books we love and want to review?” So on June 3rd, 2025, I asked myself “Why not put your patterns on products?” “Why not start an Instagram account for your designs and see what happens?” In the past, I would have come to a full stop at the idea of putting myself out there. The idea of being vulnerable used to be too daunting for me. The little voices saying, “you’ll probably fail” and “no one is going to buy this,” would have been too consuming for me to even start. But now, I ask myself “why not” and just see where it takes me.

This whole journey is based off of that simple question. Why not? So when I say I have no idea what I am doing, I truly mean it. But I am doing research and putting myself out there to see where it goes. If nothing comes from it, so be it. I won’t have lost anything in the process. So ask yourself “why not?” the next time you have a big, daunting idea and see where it takes you.

What’s to Come

My goal for this newsletter is to be part blog (which again, I have zero experience with, but realized I like writing after typing this out, so here we go!), part information on what my latest products are, and what I am or will be working on.

My website is LIVE! I will always be adding new patterns to the website, but if there is any product you want a pattern or design on, fill out my poll below to let me know.

Thank you!

A HUGE thank you to everyone who has shown interest in signing up for my newsletter. I promise they will not always be this lengthy. Throughout much of this journey, ideas have been speaking to me and this blog style newsletter was an idea that popped into my head at 3 am, and I had to get out. Please check out the polls to help provide feedback and help me develop my designs!

Check Out My Poll, Website and Socials!